A ceremony that reflects the person
Personal, flexible and true to the life remembered
A civil or mixed-belief funeral does not have to follow one fixed tradition.
The ceremony focuses on the life, character and relationships of the person who has died. It gives family and friends time to remember them honestly, share stories and recognise the difference they made.
A civil ceremony is not led as an act of religious worship, but it can still include familiar words, music or traditions. A mixed-belief ceremony is especially helpful when the person who died, their partner or members of the family hold different beliefs.
Bringing different beliefs together
Everyone can feel respected and included
Families are rarely all the same. Some people may be religious, some Humanist, some unsure and others may not identify with any belief. The ceremony can make room for those differences without asking anyone to pretend.
I will listen carefully to what matters to you and help find a balance that feels natural. The person and their story remain at the heart of the ceremony, while meaningful beliefs and traditions are treated with care.
Can religious elements be included?
Yes, when they have personal meaning
A prayer, hymn, Bible reading or another religious or cultural tradition can be included if it is important to the person who died or to those gathering to remember them.
I am not an ordained minister, so I do not lead worship or call people to prayer. I am, however, comfortable reading a prayer, introducing a hymn and welcoming contributions from relatives, friends or a faith representative.
We will discuss the wording and order together so that every element belongs within one coherent and respectful ceremony.
Planning the ceremony
We begin with time to talk and remember
I will call you first and arrange a meeting in your home, a quiet coffee shop or another place where you feel comfortable. We can also meet by video call.
I will ask about your ideas for the ceremony and learn about the person through your memories. We can discuss their personality, relationships, values, interests and the moments that best show who they were.
I normally write the life story, although I am equally happy to use a tribute already written by the family. Contributions from relatives and friends are welcome. If someone wishes to speak, I will have a copy of their words and can step in if they find it too difficult on the day.
Your approval
You will read the ceremony before the funeral
After our meeting, I will send you a complete draft. You can comment, suggest edits and correct or add details. Nothing is treated as final until you are comfortable that the ceremony reflects the person and your family's wishes.
Making the ceremony personal
Words, music and moments that mean something
The ceremony can include:
- Prayers, hymns and religious readings
- Favourite or meaningful music
- Poetry and other readings
- Tributes from family and friends
- A photographic slideshow
- A live singer or instrumentalist
- Quiet reflection accompanied by music
- Web streaming for people who cannot attend
I will arrange the different elements so that the ceremony flows naturally and fits the time available. The farewell can speak on behalf of everyone gathered, give thanks for the person's life and gently lead towards saying goodbye.
Where can the ceremony take place?
At the place that is right for you
I can lead civil and mixed-belief ceremonies at crematoria, cemeteries and burial grounds, natural burial sites, and separate memorial or celebration-of-life gatherings.
I am based in Hardwicke, Gloucester, and work with families throughout Gloucestershire and the South West.